A few years ago, an acquaintance of mine made a Facebook post that really affected me. She was talking about a friend who was really struggling with life and needed some help. I felt that she was basically chewing everyone out for not helping this friend. My first reaction was to feel guilty for not helping this person, who I didn’t even know was struggling. As I sat at my computer wondering what I could do for this person, I wondered if it was even worth it now that this person had publicized everything. I also wondered what service would even mean to this person now that we had all been called out for not helping. Then a thought came to me, “What if you are the person that is being talked about in this post.” I knew it wasn’t me, but that acquaintance who wrote the article didn’t know what was going on in my life. It might as well have been me.
I mulled it over in my mind for a full day before I made my own post on Facebook. Usually, I am someone who just reposts other people’s articles. I don’t do social media very well. Here is what I wrote:
So I read this yesterday but didn’t post until today because I was thinking about it a lot. My first thoughts were, “I wonder who I was leaving out? How could I help? I’m not a very good friend, especially on social media. I don’t love it. I felt guilty.” Today my thoughts went to, “What if I was the friend this article was talking about? What if I don’t have the energy or resources today to reach out to someone who did need my help? I just hope that people don’t judge someone because they don’t reach out. Instead of judging a person, let’s reach out to them, maybe they are the ones that need the help.” I hope this makes sense; I just saw a whole new light today. Instead of feeling guilty for not being the best friend, I want to find joy in what I can do, when I can do it. I think that is what God wants us to do and He will inspire us to do what we are capable of. Mental illness is real. I don’t know all the answers, but I love those I meet. I’m trying to be the best friend I can.
I learned a few things from this experience. First, don’t judge other people for what they might or might not do. Everyone is struggling with something, and they don’t need added pressure. Second, don’t be hard on yourself. If you are incapable of fulfilling someone’s needs at the moment, there will be other opportunities. God will put you in the right place at the right time and will help you fulfill the tasks He needs you to do. If I was supposed to help that friend, He would have helped me find out about her needs. Third, if you are struggling and need help--ask for it. If you stay quiet about your needs, how can you get the help you require? One of the hardest things we can do is ask others for help, but if we truly need it and don’t ask, we are denying individuals the opportunity to serve.
More Love and kindness are needed in this world. Sharing those two attributes is probably the best way we can serve mankind. Let’s find a way to love. Let’s find a way to show kindness. Let’s find a way to not judge. Let’s find a way to serve!
Quote from Henry B. Eyring: "When you meet someone, treat them as if they were in serious trouble, and you will be right more than half the time.”
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